When I was offered RO DBT, I thought, \u201cRight, this is going to make everything better. Let\u2019s go.\u201d I figured that I would turn up every week, listen to what I was told, and by the time I reached the end of the course, as if by magic, I would be cured, my life would be in order and I\u2019d be free of any mental health issues.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The first few weeks, I wondered why that wasn\u2019t happening. If each lesson was a step on the road to this idealised future, surely I would feel forward progress? Why were things still such a struggle? Wasn\u2019t it working?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It was then that I realised the course doesn\u2019t \u2018fix\u2019 you. Instead, it gives you the tools to face the challenges of life a bit more flexibly so that when you\u2019re released back out into the wild, you can deal with things more effectively than you did before. You can\u2019t just sit there and passively absorb the information \u2013 you have to do the work yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
RO DBT isn\u2019t like surgery where somebody else comes in and repairs the damage. It\u2019s more like learning to ride a bike. The therapists fit you on the stabilisers, hold you up, give you encouragement and pick you up when you fall, but ultimately, you\u2019re the one pedalling. It\u2019s terrifying and uncomfortable and you wobble all over the place. It feels really unnatural. But as you go into the classes and one-to-ones and tell them about your experiences \u2013 this week I hit a rock, last week I struggled with a hill \u2013 things slowly start to make sense.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Before the end, your confidence grows, you experiment with new ways of riding, and you start thinking about what happens next. Finally, when it\u2019s time to leave, they take off the stabilisers and you\u2019re away, with new skills to see you through the hard times and more flexible ways of coping.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Am I \u2018fixed\u2019? No. That\u2019s an unrealistic goal for therapy. However, I can now ride a bike and I know how to get back on if I fall off. The future remains up to me and it is on me how I apply these lessons to my life. At the end of the day, it remains a choice, but so long as I continue to take things one hour, one minute, one breath at a time, I think I\u2019ll be okay.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
My advice to people starting RO DBT is to see it as a new way of moving around your life. Your current coping style, walking, is comfortable and it\u2019s familiar, but it was walking that got you here in the first place. Perhaps riding a bike might make things a little easier? That\u2019s up to you, but one thing is certain: you\u2019ll never know until you try.<\/p>\n\n\n\n