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J. Nicole Little Archive

Rules!

If you are a RO therapist or client, you will know that the therapy introduces 5 Behavioural Themes in individual sessions.  The 5 themes are: Inhibited Emotional Expression Overly Cautious and Hyper-Vigilant Rigid and Rule Governed Behaviour Aloof and Distant Relationships Envy and Bitterness The purpose of introducing these themes is to gather social signalling […]

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Kindness First and Foremost

I have been giving some extra thoughts these days to Lesson 17 from the Skills Manual.  As I reflected in my last blog, British Columbia has a provincial health officer whose motto is “Be kind, be calm, be safe.”  Everyone in my province has been reminded of this daily though COVID updates, but also through […]

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Compulsive Striving in a time of COVID

Well, as it turns out, I have a super fan of my blog postings!  Her name is Judy, and yes, she is my mom (Hi mom!).  She mentioned in passing that she had not seen a blog post in a while on this site.  I told her that since the pandemic hit the globe, not […]

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Sneaky Work Strikes Again!

As a card carrying OC, I find reward in accomplishing tasks. Vacations and time off are a challenge. I’ve written book chapters in Hawaii and the outer banks of North Carolina, staring at my computer screen while breathtakingly beautiful beaches are just a few feet away. I’ve answered mundane emails while in Japan, and spent […]

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OC Approach coping out of control!

I would like to think that I am not “into” my phone.  And I don’t mean the rotary phone in my house that we wow the neighbourhood kids with 🙂  I am referring to my cell phone.  Perhaps I have some secret pride about this, BTW, but I guess it is not so secret if […]

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Yes, we have no bananas

As regular readers might know, I am traveling more these days with delivering intensive trainings in RO DBT.  It has been an absolute privilege and delight to train alongside Tom, Erica, Kristen and Sophie.  My mother in law commented prior to the last trip: “You sure have met some good friends on this journey, eh?” […]

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Best Thing to Pack When Travelling? Flexible Mind

I have an enduring old story that “I am not a traveller.”  As someone who leans to OC, I naturally prefer structure, routine and predictable outcomes.  I hate public loos (but know where they all are), not knowing what bus to catch or making mistakes in another language.  The first time I went to France […]

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A Novel Idea: Bibliotherapy in RO DBT – Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine

One of the things I love about working with clients who lean to overcontrol is that generally speaking, they are articulate, intelligent and due to their risk and social adverse nature, often very well read and creative.  Long before I began working in the RO DBT realm, I was a keen proponent of bibliotherapy.  Bibliotherapy […]

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Oberon’s Cape

The year I was cast as Puck in A Midsummer’s Night Dream was supposed to be the highlight of my high school experience.  Contrary to popular belief, people who lean to overcontrol (of which I am one) often excel in activities that involve audiences.  This can include public speaking, teaching, and positions of leadership.  As […]

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What Beowulf Taught me about Playfulness

Since my involvement as RO DBT, I have learned a lot about playfulness.  Clinically, I have learned that bringing playful irreverence into the therapy room and skills class functions to model to people who lean to overcontrol (OC; of which I am one) that chilling out is therapeutic. After all, if we are not playful […]

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Which Witch is a Witch? The Power of Perceptual Biases

For many years, I taught at the post-secondary level, mostly in the field of Child and Youth Care (or social pedagogy as it known in Europe).  The first teaching gig I had involved me holding my breath behind the lectern hoping I would pass out, but that is another story for another blog.  One of […]

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Chilling Out is Therapeutic – Even for RO DBT Therapists

When I teach skills class, I will confess I kinda cringe when we get to lesson 5.  Week 5 is dedicated to Engaging in Novel Behaviour and includes a discussion of the art of non-productivity.  For someone who leans toward over control (OC), my brain automatically switches the term “non-productivity” to “laziness.”  I cringe because […]

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