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J. Nicole Little Archive

OC Approach coping out of control!

I would like to think that I am not “into” my phone.  And I don’t mean the rotary phone in my house that we wow the neighbourhood kids with 🙂  I am referring to my cell phone.  Perhaps I have some secret pride about this, BTW, but I guess it is not so secret if […]

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Yes, we have no bananas

As regular readers might know, I am traveling more these days with delivering intensive trainings in RO DBT.  It has been an absolute privilege and delight to train alongside Tom, Erica, Kristen and Sophie.  My mother in law commented prior to the last trip: “You sure have met some good friends on this journey, eh?” […]

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Best Thing to Pack When Travelling? Flexible Mind

I have an enduring old story that “I am not a traveller.”  As someone who leans to OC, I naturally prefer structure, routine and predictable outcomes.  I hate public loos (but know where they all are), not knowing what bus to catch or making mistakes in another language.  The first time I went to France […]

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A Novel Idea: Bibliotherapy in RO DBT – Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine

One of the things I love about working with clients who lean to overcontrol is that generally speaking, they are articulate, intelligent and due to their risk and social adverse nature, often very well read and creative.  Long before I began working in the RO DBT realm, I was a keen proponent of bibliotherapy.  Bibliotherapy […]

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Oberon’s Cape

The year I was cast as Puck in A Midsummer’s Night Dream was supposed to be the highlight of my high school experience.  Contrary to popular belief, people who lean to overcontrol (of which I am one) often excel in activities that involve audiences.  This can include public speaking, teaching, and positions of leadership.  As […]

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What Beowulf Taught me about Playfulness

Since my involvement as RO DBT, I have learned a lot about playfulness.  Clinically, I have learned that bringing playful irreverence into the therapy room and skills class functions to model to people who lean to overcontrol (OC; of which I am one) that chilling out is therapeutic. After all, if we are not playful […]

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Which Witch is a Witch? The Power of Perceptual Biases

For many years, I taught at the post-secondary level, mostly in the field of Child and Youth Care (or social pedagogy as it known in Europe).  The first teaching gig I had involved me holding my breath behind the lectern hoping I would pass out, but that is another story for another blog.  One of […]

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Chilling Out is Therapeutic – Even for RO DBT Therapists

When I teach skills class, I will confess I kinda cringe when we get to lesson 5.  Week 5 is dedicated to Engaging in Novel Behaviour and includes a discussion of the art of non-productivity.  For someone who leans toward over control (OC), my brain automatically switches the term “non-productivity” to “laziness.”  I cringe because […]

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Take it Teasy

I have been giving more thought to the concept of teasing lately. Often in my experience as an educator and clinical supervisor, I have noted how clinical assessments and case conceptualizations sometimes conflate teasing with bullying. “Oh, he was really teased in middle school” or “my parents were relentless teasers.”  And the use of these terms […]

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Bitterness, revenge and fox gloves

One of the major themes that is covered in RO DBT is that of bitterness.  If you say the word out loud, it can sound like it tastes – harsh.  When I say the word out loud, my lip inadvertently curls into a contemptuous social signal.  It’s like bitterness and contempt walk hand in hand.  […]

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The Other F Word: FAKE

Much of RO DBT therapy includes an emphasis on practicing skills that will help people who lean toward overcontrol (OC) get back into the tribe, and as a result, back to optimal mental health.  According to Lynch, psychological health or well-being in RO DBT is hypothesized to involve three core transacting features: Receptivity and Openness […]

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My Obsession with Eyebrows

I’ve done a few degrees, but I think I am now doing a post-doc in eyebrows.  I never really thought much about eyebrows, really.  They are just kinda there, aren’t they?  The first time I paid attention to eyebrows was with my dad, whose eyebrows are, I admit, quite impressive.  While he has precious little […]

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